Call of Duty: Pugs

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Kate, Winston, Sam and Bruce  @ Cafe Bianca, Mount Hawthorn
Kate, Winston, Sam and Bruce @ Cafe Bianca, Mount Hawthorn

Pugs are good at tricking people.

I bet they would be good at shoot em up games on the Xbox.

The moment Bruce and Winston entered the cafe it was as if the Godfather had arrived.

Albeit a couple of slightly small tubby furry balls of pure love.

Regardless, they had something about them.


The type of presence that requires a hand gesture to accompany it when you say it, just to emphasise it correctly.

Wouldn’t want to piss them off.

It was clear to me, either these pugs had been to a highly reputable acting school or something else was a foot… or paw… or whatever.

They had these cute snotty noses too, but underneath their unassuming looks was an atmosphere equivalent to a highly trained special air service soldier.

You wouldn’t think it at first.

Pugs are are sneaky. They appear to be there for you… always.

Just watching you.


They are there when you wake.


‘How long have they been watching me?’

They would make make amazing door to door sales reps. Impossible to say no to. I bet they have done NLP too. And not just any NLP, the Gary De Rodriguez type.

Early on Sunday morning, I met with Kate Martinez and her two pugs, Bruce and Winston.

Toats adorable.

Or should I say I met with Bruce and Winston and their public relations manager, Ms. Kate?

No yapping, no annoying dog behaviour and no knocking the furniture around.

Oh no.

These guys were professionals.

You could tell they were carrying.

Weapons, I mean.

The wet licky type.

And the subtle yet effective cute disguise. A bulletproof Clark Kent slash Superman disguise.


I think Winston was even winking at me a few times.

Was he flirting to get information from me? It wasn’t going to work. I was going to strong.

Maybe these pugs had studied negotiation and interrogation techniques during their field experience in China?

And I’m sure Bruce was trying to make out with me at least once.

I didn’t feel comfortable. I felt like he was mentally undressing me with those big coy cow eyes just to find where I had hidden the doggy treats.

Besides, I had only just met them and I don’t go for pugs, no matter how adorable, cute and snotty nose.

Especially on the first date.

Ms. Kate did get a word in every now and then. She was clearly passionate about her assignment of being the PA (Pug Assistant) for Winston and Bruce. I wondered if they paid well, the pugs I mean.

Kate is full ball on dog rescue, especially pugs. If you want a pug, talk to Kate or at least follow her clear advice and do your research.

She also makes beds for dogs. Little cute adorable adorable beds where they can sleep, rather than on your bed.

Unless you’re into that.

If you were ever in a crisis, what dog would you want to be there? For the cuddles I mean? Pugs would have to be the natural choice.

Are you a pug lover, hater, willing to try-er?

Leave a snot trail of a comment below and remember to subscribe for more riveting articles just like this.


Kate’s Pug pages:

Bruce’s Facebook page

Kate’s Beds for dogs

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